Gratitude is The Answer

Hello dear friends,


Lately, I have been working on preparing a new business.  Since I am a neophyte entrepreneur, this is not a skill set I have experience with, nor am I particularly confident in my as-yet-unproven abilities.  This makes for some days or parts of days where my positive outlook is challenged.  In the past few weeks I have been creating a web site.  Let's just say that now I understand why people hire experts to do that work.  Since I am from a long line of "do-it-yourself-ers" it seemed only natural and proper that I would undertake this endeavor with enthusiasm and pluck.  Three days in, I found myself with gritted teeth, and not much enthusiasm.  The pluck, however, remains.  During this most interesting time of development, negativity was a frequent visitor.  During those times, I would like to say I did not entertain that visitor, but politely showed him the door.  Well, I am human.  On occasion, I invited negativity in for a cup of tea, a little pity party, just for me.  But I am happy to reflect that, without exception, sooner or later - more often sooner, thankfully- I remembered to use the tools I have learned in order to move myself back into harmony and into a positive frame of mind, and feelings of contentment, if not happiness or joy.  Gratitude does it every time.


Gratitude is a mysterious and funny thing.  Being able to express gratitude in the moment that one is enraptured in problem, misery, regret, or self-pity is, admittedly, difficult. I would say it is an advanced spiritual skill, made easier by practicing it during less stressful times.  I am in the habit of composing a gratitude list each evening before retiring, if not formally in my journal, at least mentally, while winding down and preparing for sleep.


People in 12 step recovery are familiar with "gratitude lists".  It is a primary tool for moving from negative emotional/mental space into the moment by consciously letting go of "the problem(s)" and inviting the remembrance of positive experience and good feeling.  Doing this frequently over the past five years has resulted in the ability to "catch myself" mid-pity party, and to refocus my energy on something that makes me feel good.  Today, before my run, I made what I thought was a witty comment to my wife about her morning walk.  To her credit, she laced up her shoes, hit the pavement and power-walked for 30 minutes.  I jokingly made light of her efforts by calling it a "short walk".  Her response indicated that she felt insulted and angry at my perceived put-down.  As I was running, I entered the space into which I had invited myself by that comment.  In a few seconds, I was not only physically running, but mentally, I was running into negative territory, recalling all the slights and injuries I have inflicted on my my wife and others.  "Just a minute", I interrupted myself.  "I am glad to be where I am today, able to see my flaws and to be able to change what doesn't work for me."  "I'm sorry, please forgive me" (to myself for stepping into the negative) "Thank you, I love you" (to my higher power, myself ). I mentally moved into gratitude space, repeating that simple mantra for a half mile or so.  When I got home, I promptly apologized to my wife for my negative comment and complimented her commitment to self-care.  This completely cleared the air between us and helped us both move into a positive space of love and connectedness.


Gratitude lists are only one way of expressing and moving into the loving space of thankfulness.  The Ho'oponopono prayer, or mantra, "I'm sorry, please forgive me.  Thank you, I love you." is a quick way to take personal responsibility for moving out of Love and for remembering that, even though I can temporarily become unaware of living in Love, it is my true home.  I can return anytime I choose.  It feels so good to be in that loving space, that I feel it is worth the effort to return, each time I forget that I am already there.


Thinking about someone, some place, or something that brings a good feeling is another way to move into the space of gratitude.  Positive affirmations are another.  Engaging in some activity that brings you joy or peace or excitement, pulls you into present moment focus, is another way that comes to mind.  There are lots more, I'm sure.  The point is, life is too short to be living in past regret, guilty, shame, remorse, resentment or sadness; or in worry or fear of the future.  It is too short to be caught up in negativity.  That doesn't mean we ignore real feelings that we're having about something we've done, or someone else has done.  These feelings are our "guidance system" as my mentor Linda Meyerholz calls them.  They exist to indicate when a boundary has been crossed, or we're headed in the wrong direction.  Sometimes they're just feelings that arise from our mental process, developed out of habit.  We acknowledge them, take action if that is necessary, let them pass, and move back into the present moment.  Gratitude helps me do this, and for this, I am truly grateful.


Thank you, I love you.


Dave

Welcome to Conscious Now

Hello friends. Today is a beautiful day to practice living in the moment. I start each day with gratitude, consciously expressing thanks for the new day. A good way to get in touch with the present moment is to spend some time at the beginning of each day in meditation, quieting the mind. I like the early morning hours, as the currents of the mind tend to be less active. The previous day's happenings are past, the body and mind have (hopefully) had the rest of deep sleep, and the happenings of this new day have not yet commenced. This is a perfect time to get centered and focus on your connection to the creative force, the divine, nature, whatever you call that which is greater than you. I like sitting meditation early in the morning. Some people prefer an active exercise, like qigong. The point is to focus on the present and still the active mind.

Throughout the day, I like to practice staying in the NOW, the present moment, by noticing when I have slipped away from it - ruminating on something that has happened in the past (even the past few moments) or worrying about something that hasn't yet occurred - and gently reminding my mind to stay focused. Some people use a mantra to keep their mind focused on something neutral in order to keep it from "running around" aimlessly. When I catch my mind running out, I like to use the Ho’oponopono prayer, "I'm sorry, please forgive me. Thank you, I love you." I repeat that several times, or for a few minutes, and that seems to quiet my mind and refocus it on the present moment.

Living consciously is simple, but it is not always easy. We humans have a great gift of this "bodymind" in which we live. It is powerful beyond our comprehension, but most of us "sleepwalk through life, in a reactive mode, where our thoughts and behaviors are simply repetitions of subconsiously learned programs, reacting to the people and events surrounding us. Conscious living represents awakening from this slumber-like state, and realizing that every moment is precious, as it is the only reality. In living consciously we choose, each moment, to be one hundred percent present and aware, or we choose to be "somewhere else", missing our life as it passes by.

Understanding that it is a rare individual who is fully present at every moment, start from where you are, and practice present moment awareness. Noticing that your mind has been "away" in the past or the future is the beginning of being present. Each time you catch yourself and bring your awareness to the NOW, you are practicing conscious living. With practice, you will more quickly notice when you have "gone away" and, little-by-little, you will experience longer and longer periods of present moment awareness. Don't judge yourself, or beat yourself up, just silently repeat "I'm sorry, please forgive me. Thank you, I love you" and focus on the perfection of this moment. Feel the love that flows through you as you practice being conscious now.


Thank you for your kind attention.  Love and blessings to you as you travel the path of conscious living.


 Namaste.